Thursday, May 31, 2012

Fam

Over the last 3 years my thoughts and feelings towards "family", and what that means, have changed.  Maybe not a lot, maybe not at all, but I've definitely been thinking about and articulating what I want family to mean to me.
  
Ever since my little family was whittled from 4 down to 2, it's been on my mind a lot.  Rightly so.  I don't see Kaed much anymore, and though I still have a great relationship with him, his absence has had a greater impact on me than most realize.  In my previous post, I waxed poetic on how much Dash loves his brother and wants him around all the time.  I'm in the same boat.  Kaed was not just my girlfriend/wife's kid, he became like a son to me.  He was a catalyst in my being with Leah in the first place.  It was a priviledge to care for him and I openly welcome (still) every opportunity.  (Kaed's got a great dad btw)  But with him around much less now, it's caused some things to come into focus for me regarding Dash. 

Dash.  DSL.  Little Diesel.  My little boy is going to be in kindergarten next year!  How is this possible?  How am I this old?  Ha.  Lately I've been reading a lot on children who come from "broken homes" and study after study confirms some of my biggest fears: kids are like their parents!  Shoot.  What is normal in a child's life will most likely be the norm in their own homes as adults.  I'll be honest, that's a little scary.  And I'm going to do whatever I can to prevent some of his current "norms" don't become permanent norms.  I probably aught to stop reading all these parenting studies because all they seem to do is freak me out.  Knowledge = responsibility = prevention = A TON OF PRAYER & THE WORD.  

"Your children will become what you are; so be what you want them to be." -David Bly

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